My oh my.

There are those people who think Mariners play by play announcer Dave Niehaus is an idiot because he says things like:

"LINE DRIVE...tapped back to the pitcher, who throws on to first for the easy putout."

But I think it's because he says things like:

"And then [Lou Gehrig] was diagnosed with A.L.S., the disease for which he was named."

When I have kids, I'm naming one of them Emphysema.